Bride of the Monster (1955)

Mutants! Monsters! Giant atomic octopi? BRIDE OF THE MONSTER has them all, and at breakneck prices! Ed Wood's next cinematic blunder takes us into the laboratory of the diabolical Dr. Varnoff, who has harnessed the power of the atom in order to create a race of atomic supermen. His plan is almost spoiled when a daring young reporter sets out to investigate the claims of a giant monster that has killed over twelve people, but her unfortunate trip into the marshes may lead her to become the next bride of the atom!

It is impossible to discuss a film like BRIDE OF THE MONSTER without complete enthusiasm and loving adoration despite the horrendous production at hand. Wood's tattered sets and awful editing are nothing compared to the absurd plot and silliness of the acting. In one of the most bizarre and unconvincing moments ever recorded on film, Wood has his actors wrestle with the lifeless limbs of a stolen rubber octopus in a shallow pool of water as he cuts back and forth between the (in)action occurring on screen and stock footage of a captive octopus in some far-off aquarium. What then becomes the greatest difficulty is deciding on a favorite character between Tor Johnson's gaping-jawed Lobo, Bela Lugosi's vapid Dr. Varnoff, or the robotic Loretta King in the lead. The endless amounts of inane dialog only end up adding to the overall charm of the picture. As if GLEN OR GLENDA, JAIL BAIT, and BRIDE OF THE MONSTER weren't enough to crown him as one of the worst filmmakers of all time, Wood's next picture, PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE, would somehow manage to lower the bar even further...

Rating: 3/10.
Entertainment: 7/10.

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  1. Yes indeedy. Leave all common sense and critical judgment behind when popping this into the player. It defies ... well, anything.

  2. It's a classic, for all the reasons that it shouldn't be.

    As a bonus, all of us Netflix users- and those with YouTube- can watch the MST3K version of it for free. How can you get better than that?

  3. When watching Wood films, I find I must resist the temptation to count the easter eggs. That is, to try and spot the major plot, logic, and prop faiures.

  4. better than Plan 9 but stil far from being good

  5. Working on a sequel/parody of Bride Of The Monster! New feature "Dr Vornoff vs The Martians!", coming early next year!

    Tamper in God's domain with us! Back the project! :)